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How to Mean "Yes" to Sex

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The Sex Plan

Before beginning to have sex,  you need to have a sex plan. This plan is a living document and will change as you grow in your sexuality.  If you don't have a plan, you risk being a player in someone else's plan, and you may end up doing things that you don't want to do. 



Even the best plans sometimes go wrong. Make sure you always have an exit plan. The minute you become uncomfortable GET OUT. You may risk damaging the relationship if some guy gets mad at you, but you should never risk damaging the relationship with yourself. 



Who do you want to have sex with?

How does he make you feel?

What is his character?

How does he treat you and the other people in his life? 



What are you comfortable doing? 

If you aren't sure, do you feel safe enough with this person to experiment? 

Do you feel you can stop
what you don't like?


What are the reasons you are having sex? 

Do you want the sex, or something that the sex will get you? 

Consent is an ongoing,
moment-to-moment consideration of your decision to participate in a sexual situation. You must feel that you can change course whenever you want.